Be careful with the tongue

One of the more delicate issues in a relationship is discussing appearance. This can be a very prickly discussion, and should probably be avoided, if possible. However, avoiding this topic is not always possible, especially when the questions is directed right at you. But, if your partner is wearing something new, or has a new haircut that you do not particularly like, you should use care and caution when giving your opinion. The problem is, you want to be honest with your partner, especially if you do not like something otherwise, they may continue to wear something you are not necessarily fond of or keep a hairstyle that is less than appealing. You should never be totally direct about your feelings, but you also do not want to water them down so much that they are interpreted as okay or that you approve of the new style. It is okay to let your partner know that you prefer a different style attire, or a different hairstyle rather than what they are wearing, but abstain from expressing your opinions in a negative or hurtful way. Weight is another delicate issues that many couples have a difficult time discussing and although it is uncomfortable for both partners, men seem to have more trouble discussing this than women. Although women do not want to gain weight, and keep a trim figure, they also do not want to hear that they are gaining weight, or losing their figure. There is a fine line to walk upon and finding the right ways to approach the subject may take a little practice. Many couples talk about these things in advance and an understanding is made that allows each of them to freely, but tactfully discuss appearance, weight, likes and dislikes about the other person’s attire and physical attributes.

Nobody likes a whiner, or nagger or complainer
One of the tell tale signs of a longer relationship is when there is nagging involved. Unfortunately, however, this is not a sign that should be looked upon as a good sign or healthy sign. Nagging, complaining or whining is not just done by women, contrary to what most believe, by both men and women have been known to fall into the habit of nagging, whining or complaining and not only is it annoying, it also brings the relationship down. Nagging, whining and complaining can become habitual habits and grow old very quickly. Relationships have enough stress surrounding them and they do not need the additional pressure of nagging, whining or complaining. Often, the partner who is on the receiving end of the ongoing whining will end up relenting or giving in to their partners demands to avoid negative confrontation. However, this is not healthy for either person in the relationship. Couples need to respect each other enough to have mature conversations that do not include behaviors that mirror those of a toddler. Couples need to either move away from those negative relational habits or never allow themselves to fall into bad habits. The best way to avoid nagging, complaining or whining is by talking about it. When you feel this is becoming an issue, talk to your partner and discuss it with them. Your partner may not even be aware that they are behaving in such a negative fashion. In addition, if you allow the behavior to continue, then you are part of the problem. Relationships require mutual respect and when one partner is not demonstrating that respect and manipulating their partner through whining, complaining or nagging, the health of the relationship is jeopardized.

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