Some people jump back into dating after a bad break up (is there any other kind?) or divorce waaaaaay before they’re emotionally ready. Often times unresolved feelings of anger, longing for lost love or wanting to rub their ex’s face in their new relationship become their date’s problem.
People are notoriously bad about lying in their on-line dating profiles, too. They will post photos from ten years ago when they were dieting for their wedding. They will list interests that they think make them sound sophisticated, hip and cool, but not actually what they are in to. You’ll see a lot of people describe themselves as very active or very fit, and claim to love exercise.
So how do you avoid people who might not be ready to date, who may be emotionally strung out, or those who are outright lying about themselves, their lives, and the kind of person they want to meet? There are red flags that if you see one in an on-line dating profile, watch out! Proceed with caution.
The first thing that should raise a red flag is a very grainy photo that has elements in it that are “dated.” For instance, if the photo is very small or poor quality, that could mean it was scanned onto a computer and uploaded because it was taken BEFORE the digital camera era. That means it is not a current picture and the person in the profile will probably not resemble the person in the photo all that much anymore.
So what if their photo looks crisp and digital? Well, go ahead and click on it if they look appealing to you keeping in mind, though; do they appear to be in your age range? If so, peruse their profile. Note their birth date if it’s listed. If they say they are 37 but were at Woodstock, they are probably a little bit older than that, right?
Red flags in the profile that might signal that this person is not emotionally ready to date could be phrases like, “adulterers need not apply”, or “no lying, cheating women.” Yikes! Get out of there, NOW! This person will very likely transfer those negative emotions to you so best to avoid anyone with that in their profile.
On the flip side, if their profile says they are sure the love of their life is just waiting for them and they already have the first baby name picked out, perhaps that’s rushing things a bit. Unless you are in a rush to get to the altar and the maternity ward yourself, move on to the next profile.
You can look for clues that the person is or is not being honest about themselves in their profile if you know the warning signs. If they say they love to travel, yet don’t list a single place they’ve been , and don’t have any travel photos in their profile, be a little suspicious that this may not be entirely true. If they say they love all kinds of movies, that’s probably not true. I mean it’s possible, but very unlikely. You should see if they list the titles of movies they love and if they are ones you’ve seen and enjoyed or never watched because they are not for you.
Here are just a few other things to think about and look for in an on-line dating profile that might be a red flag to heed. If they say they are very fit or active but don’t say how they stay that way or what activities they like to do, be wary. If they say they don’t have kids, but there’s a swing set in the background in one of the photos, just guide your mouse away from their profile.
Maybe you’re not ready to date, maybe you are exaggerating how fit you are or claiming to love dogs because you think chicks dig it. If, so, come clean. If you are guilty of having any of these red flags in your dating profile, consider revising with the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.