Have Fun Dating, not Discussing the Past

I am always floored by how many people make the mistake of talking about previous relationships when they are dating. Most people do not want to hear about romances gone bad, sad endings to once hopeful relationships or messy breakups. Perhaps if the dating turns into something more permanent, there will be a time and place for those discussions, but dating is not the venue. Sure this may be something you are interested in learning about, and your date may share those same feelings, dating is not the stage for these discussions. When this topic is brought up, people get easily lost in the details of their sad stories and the result can be no second date.

You are venturing out so let your date get to know you, your likes, dislikes, ambitions, and hobbies, but not your dating history. Remember, you are on the date to start fresh, and, hopefully develop a new relationship, not relive past experiences.

Don’t talk too much
Dating can be a bit uncomfortable because you are trying to impress the person you are with, put your best foot forward, and of course, solidify another date and so many things can go wrong over the course of a date that can ultimately be toxic to your chances. There are, of course, many dos and don’ts in the dating arena and one of those is never talk excessively or dominate the conversation. Give your date the opportunity to talk or chime in on a topic and allow yourself to get to know your date. A good rule of thumb is to always observe your drinking glass or plate. If you your drink never seems to go down, but your date’s does, perhaps you are talking a bit too much.

Of course there are nuances to this rule that do make excessive chatter a bit more permissible. You may be on a date with someone who is naturally quiet or even shy and this can often lead to that uncomfortable silence that makes the date awkward. If that is the case, probe your date a little by asking questions that will force a response.

Find the talking balance with your date. You are there to get to know each other so make sure you are taking the time to listen, ask questions and learn about the person you are dating.

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