The First Date: The Importance of Location and Planning

When you want to start dating someone, you want your first date with them to go well. What is the key to making sure your first date is fun, or even happens at all?

You might think: “we’ll just hang out and see what happens.” You realize that you “hang out” all of the time with your best friends, and that always seems to go well. Although this sounds like a good idea on paper, it is not a good idea for a first date. Just hanging out without any plan for the day might work well with your friends, but that is because they are your friends and you know them well. When dating someone for the first time, you don’t know much about the person, and the two of you won’t feel as comfortable around each other as with friends.

Plan your first date well. Even if you’re not the type of person who likes making plans, make this one an exception. Set up a time and place for the date. If you tell your date to meet up “whenever,” then your partner might not view the date as important. The day of the date, they might call you up to cancel, saying that something “came up.” They’ll have some excuse why they can’t “hang out” with you because all you were planning to do was “hang out.” Since the other person doesn’t know you well at all, if they find that they have the chance to engage in a fun activity with one of their friends, then they might pick that fun activity rather than the obscure date with you that lacks and agenda.

On the other hand, if you had set up a specific time, location, and activity planned, the other person will be more inclined to make an effort to show up. This is because they know what to expect rather than having no idea what the date will be like. For most people, when it comes to dating, they fear the unknown more than the known. Furthermore, making the effort to plan the first date shows that you see this date as being important as well. Planning a date well lets the other person know that you really want to get to know them as opposed to just asking to hang out on a whim.

Always have a clear plan for the first date, even if this plan has the potential to change during the date. The fact that you have an activity planned out will prevent the awkward situation of two people hanging around trying to figure out something to do.