Your first date is the beginning of something new and exciting. The sparks flew and you want to know everything about your date. However, it’s not always easy to follow up after that first night as a way of learning more about each other. Here are 8 tips for following up after a first date so you can find out what makes your date tick.
Plan your follow up before the date
It’s easy to get caught up in the moment, but planning your follow up before you meet someone is the best way to make sure it goes smoothly. For example, you could ask them what their favorite food is so you can have that on the table for dinner. Learn more about your date and find out what makes them tick. This will give you more inspiration for conversation topics during the date as well as help you feel confident in your ability to follow up.
Keep it casual
Sometimes you’re just starved for conversation and you don’t want to follow up with a more formal first date. This is okay; it’s perfectly fine to keep your follow-up casual. For example, you could send them a funny text about something that happened during your first date like “didn’t you say something about going to the library?” Or if it was a bit more serious, like you went on a hike together and had some deep conversations about life after the hike, then send them an email letting them know how much fun you had that day.
Let them lead the conversation
It’s important to let your date lead the conversation. By doing this, you can determine what they’re interested in and get a better sense of their personality. With this opportunity, you will also be able to determine if there is potential for a second date!
Allow them to be their own person
The first thing you need to remember is your date deserves the space to be their own person. They may have a lot of interest in you, and they may have a lot of questions for you, but they don’t have to answer them all right away. Allow them to set the pace of conversation and see if they’re interested in talking more about what happened on the date or if they’re interested in staying as friends. If they want to talk more about the date, then great!
Be genuine with your thoughts and feelings
After a first date, you might be tempted to text or call your date to see if they had a good time. However, this can come across as desperate and tacky. Instead, send a handwritten note the morning after that says something thoughtful about your date. This will show them that you know how important the encounter was to them and are interested in continuing the conversation.
Don’t make it too serious
Your date might have had a great time, but you might not have. It’s important to not make the follow-up too serious, as this will likely make your date feel uncomfortable.
If you are interested in seeing your date again, try sending them a text or leaving a voicemail saying something casual like “Hey, it was fun meeting you last night! Let me know if you want to do it again sometime.”
If they don’t respond right away, be patient and try again later. It’s also worth mentioning that sometimes people are just busy and won’t be able to get back to you right away.
Stay connected in other ways
It’s not always possible to follow up after a first date. Maybe you’re still on a high from the date and don’t want to seem desperate by reaching out again. Or maybe your date is simply too busy and has no time for you. In that case, it’s important to keep contact in other ways so you can stay connected with your new love interest and learn more about them. Keep in touch by following their social media profiles, sending texts, or talking on the phone. You’ll be able to find out what they’re interested in – whether it’s a hobby or a part-time job – and get information that will help you decide if this person is the right one for you.
Follow up with your date, but make it casual and don’t make it too serious. Stay in touch in other ways and give them a chance to lead the conversation. And remember, it’s always a good idea to be genuine with your thoughts and feelings.