There are signs a man is not being authentic about his feelings. You don’t want to be with a guy who pretends but someone who’s real. Here are a few signs a man is not being authentic about his feelings…
1. He’s reluctant to discuss his feelings.
If he gets frustrated when you ask him about how he feels about something, this is a big red flag that he isn’t being authentic about his thoughts and feelings. It’s a sign that he doesn’t trust you enough to be open about his vulnerability.
2.He won’t let you see him upset.
Sometimes it’s easier for a guy to act strong and hide away from the world when things get tough than it is for him to let himself show any sign of weakness. This could be because of the societal pressures on men “to man up,” but if he’s not letting you see him upset, then how can you ever truly get close to him?
3.He mentions an ex-girlfriend all the time.
He tells you stories about her and makes comparisons between the two of you — usually in your favor. But there is no reason for him to keep bringing her up unless she is still in his heart, head or life in some way.
4.You’ve never been to his apartment.
A man who is serious about you will want to show you where he lives and make you feel comfortable there. If, after six months or a year, you haven’t been invited over, that’s a red flag.
5.He doesn’t take any responsibility.
He blames the universe for things going wrong in his life, he blames bad timing, he blames you for not understanding him. But does he ever blame himself? If he has a lot of excuses and doesn’t take responsibility, then there’s a chance that he’s not being genuine about his feelings.
6.He acts like your feelings don’t matter.
If you’re feeling down and bring something up to him and he dismisses it or tells you that your feelings are silly or stupid, then something is up. No one will understand everything about you, but someone who cares about you will at least try to and make you feel loved and appreciated at all times.
7.He says “everything is fine.”
Is everything really fine? If so, why does something feel off? If everything was fine, would anything be wrong at all? Sometimes when people have a hard time expressing themselves, they’ll just say nothing is wrong even though it clearly is. It could mean that it’s too difficult to talk about his emotions with you since maybe he isn’t being genuine about them in the first place.
8.He won’t discuss his past relationship.
It’s a major red flag if he refuses to talk about his ex and why they split up. If he can’t openly communicate with you about it, then it might be because he’s hiding something from you. Or, maybe he’s not over her yet. Either way, it could be a sign that he’s not ready for a new relationship, even if he says otherwise.
9.He doesn’t care about your friends and family.
If he never makes plans to hang out with your friends or family, then it means that you and your needs are not important to him. It could also mean that he is just not interested in getting to know the people who are closest to you. Either way, this is a clear sign of a toxic relationship and it’s time to move on without him.
10.He criticizes you constantly but refuses to take criticism himself.
There will always be moments when you and your man don’t see eye-to-eye…and bickering is completely normal in any relationship. However, if your guy refuses to listen when you have a problem and insists on criticizing every little thing about you.
11.He lacks a positive outlook on life and love.
Men who aren’t being real about their emotions often take a pessimistic view of the world, and in particular, don’t have much hope for themselves when it comes to love. They might make cynical comments about romance in general, or say things like “all women are crazy,” or “no one will ever love me.” A man who feels this way may be depressed or even narcissistic, so be careful if he tries to drag you down with him.
12.He has a sense of entitlement.
When a man feels entitled it’s because he doesn’t feel appreciated or noticed. He feels like no matter what he does it will never be good enough so why try? This feeling of entitlement is toxic and will eventually cause him to give up and walk away…every time!
13. He’s a narcissist.
If he spends time talking about himself all day long, it may mean some deeper insecurities are causing him to focus on something he believes is good: himself. Someone who is narcissistic won’t care as much about what you have to say and instead will cut you off or talk over you to make sure his point gets across. Even if he does tell you he likes you, a narcissist may not mean it and could just be telling you what you want to hear because he wants something from you.
14.He doesn’t see his partner as an equal.
A guy who’s truly in love will never put himself above his significant other. He won’t think that he’s better or deserves more just because of his gender. If he does this, then he clearly has some issues and probably isn’t worth your time if you ask me.
15.He never labels your relationship.
Dating someone without labeling the relationship can get pretty confusing — especially when everyone around you is talking about their boyfriend or girlfriend. You deserve better than mixed signals, so if your guy isn’t willing to commit and give up dating other women, take that as a sign that he doesn’t want a real relationship with you either.
16. He doesn’t make plans with you.
It’s one thing if your guy is truly busy at work and doesn’t have time to make plans with you. It’s another if he’s always too busy to see you, but somehow has time to hang out with friends or make other plans. If he doesn’t want to introduce you to his family or friends, that might also be a sign that he’s not actually interested in a long-term commitment with you.
The more a man has invested in you, the more he’s going to want to be with you. He’s not going to make excuses and cancel on you. Not making plans with you is simply a sign of disinterest.
If you’re dealing with a changing man, know that it’s probably not you. There are a multitude of factors that could be driving this behavior, but if he’s not being honest with his feelings and his actions, it’s probably because he doesn’t feel comfortable expressing himself. Recognizing these red flags can help you to determine whether he’s ready to take on an authentic relationship, or if he should continue to focus on issues in his own life.